


Sochi

by ChaosTotal (SamoShampioni)



Category: Music RPF, Real Person Fiction, Welle: Erdball
Genre: 2014 Winter Olympics, AU, Alf - Freeform, Alternate Universe, Gen, Honey, Plastique, RPF, Sochi 2014, Venus - Freeform, W:E, Welle:Erdball, Winter Olympics, sochi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-02-13
Updated: 2014-02-14
Packaged: 2018-01-12 04:08:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,032
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1181693
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SamoShampioni/pseuds/ChaosTotal
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alf spoke about Sochi in a way that he had never talked about anything else before, and Honey was getting more and more worried that Alf was actually serious with this. That Alf really wanted to go to Sochi, and he was dragging the rest of Welle: Erdball with him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Well, I took a few liberties with this story. First of all, 'bobsled racing' is completely made up. Secondly, Plastique had actually left Welle: Erdball by this point. Also, there's no way you can actually join the Olympics like this, it was just necessary for the extremely silly plot. But you know, AU and all that ;)

Honey was sitting in the computer room, and all was silent except for the buzz of computers. Alf had left the room a few hours ago, and Venus and Plastique wouldn't be here for a little while longer. That gave Honey a chance to program with his C64 in peace for a little while. Or so he thought. Alf suddenly came running back into the room, making all sorts of noise and generally distracting Honey from his programming work.  
"Hey Alf," Honey said.  
"Wow Honey, you'll never believe what happened to me today!" Alf grinned as he sat down beside him.  
"Hmm? What?" Honey said.  
"I was in the Hannover Mall today, and I got talking to these people who are in the Olympic committee for Germany, and we got talking about the upcoming 2014 Winter Olympics at Sochi! They were talking to me about this new sport... Bobsled Racing! It's the same as the bobsled event only it's an actual race! All the sleds are on the snow at the same time! Pretty exciting, huh?"  
"Mmmmm," Honey, disinterested, didn't look away from the screen. But Alf could never take the hint, and continued talking about the Olympics. Honey couldn't think of anything that bored him more.  
"But then they told me that Germany wouldn't have a team in that event, Because they need four people to operate the sled, and there was no one in Germany who would do it!"  
"Oh dear," Honey said sarcastically, still not looking up from his computer, "What a shame."  
"Exactly, but don't worry," Alf said, "Because then I said, wow, that's a lucky coincidence, there's four of us in Welle: Erdball!"  
Honey stopped typing. What an odd thing to say to someone.  
"And why did you say that?"  
"Well, uh..."   
Uh oh. Honey knew that tone. That meant Alf had gone and done something amazingly silly yet again.  
"Alf, what have you done," Honey demanded.  
"Well,, I kind of offered that we would be the bobsled racing team in Sochi..." Alf grinned.  
"You did WHAT?!"  
"Yup, we're going to Sochi and racing for Germany!"  
Honey stared in shock, but then laughed uneasily. Surely that must be a joke, right? There was no way Alf would have done that, right? And even if he had, there was no way that Team Germany would allow Welle: Erdball to represent them despite having no experience whatsoever, _right_? No, Honey decided that it had to be a joke, and that Alf's little joke had now run it's course.  
"Oh hahaha, good one Alf, you really got me there! Ha ha ha..."  
"No Honey, I'm serious!" Alf said, a little upset that Honey thought he was joking, but Honey still didn't believe him.   
"Stop it Alf, it's not funny anymore," Honey said.  
"It was never funny," Alf said, "It's _serious_."  
Honey switched off the computer. This was going to be a long day for sure.  
  
\---  
  
When Venus and Plastique finally arrived, Honey went and asked them what they thought about the situation.  
"Oh yes, we already know!" Venus smiled, "And Alf isn't joking! Why would you think that? We're already signed up to the German Olympic team! We're really going to Sochi next February! I think it's a great idea, isn't it Honey?"  
"No!" Honey yelled, "Have you all gone nuts? This is the worst idea I've ever heard!"  
"Aw, don't worry Honey," Plastique laughed, "I'm sure it'll go great!"  
Honey still refused to believe it, hoping this was all a really elaborate joke. Because if it wasn't, it would possibly be the worst thing they had ever done as Welle: Erdball. Alf had suggested silly things in the past, but never anything like this. But Alf spoke about Sochi in a way that he had never talked about anything else before, and Honey was getting more and more worried that Alf was actually serious with this. That Alf really wanted to go to Sochi, and he was dragging the rest of Welle: Erdball with him.


	2. Chapter 2

And when the German media outlets all reported on Welle: Erdball going to Sochi, he had to concede that Alf was in fact, serious. Not that it meant he hated the idea any less.  
"Oh, did you hear that Welle: Erdball are going to be part of Team Germany at Sochi?" one news reporter said to the other, trying not to laugh.  
"I have now!" the other news reporter laughed loudy as a montage of W:E clips played on the screen beside the logo of the Sochi 2014 games. Honey cursed these blasted Winter Olympics, and cursed Alf for bringing this ridiculousness to him.  
  
\---  
  
Despite Honey's attempts to get Alf to back down from this, it was clear that Alf was very determined to make Welle: Erdball a part of Team Germany.  
"Why?!" Honey yelled, "This is ridiculous! Why would you do this?!"  
"Well, so many things. You're sat at that Commodore day in, day out. It's time to step out, away from the keyboard, and see the outside world, you know!"  
Honey could only roll his eyes at this, not that Alf could see them behind the sunglasses.  
"We make electronic music!" Honey yelled, "Of course we're sat at computers! Seriously Alf, how can you be this dense?! You can't bloody do this!"  
"Well, I can, and I have."  
"No, you can't do this Alf," Honey said, "You absolutely can't. And you can't make me go to Sochi with you. I'm not going."  
"Why not Honey?" Alf said, "It'll be great, you'll see!"  
"First of all, no one here has any experience with bob racing or whatever it was called, secondly, this idea is completely ludicrous, and thirdly, we're going to be the laughing stock of this whole country!"  
"Aw, come on Honey, no one will be laughing at us! They'll be proud of us! We're part of Team Germany, after all!"  
"No! We are not part of Team Germany! I am not going to Sochi and you can't force me!"  
"May I remind you who the organiser of Welle: Erdball is?" Alf pointed to himself, "Who runs this whole thing? Me, of course. So yes, you're coming with us Honey, whether you like it or not."  
"Well, no I'm not," Honey said, and walked out of the room.  
"Well, you're wrong," Alf grinned to himself.

\---  
  
It was a few days later, and Honey was still very much ignoring the whole issue. Yes, maybe if he ignored it, then it would all just go away and be forgotten about.  
It was at that moment when Plastique walked into the room. But instead of wearing the dark clothes typical of Welle: Erdball, she was wearing a gaudy, brightly coloured costume. Several layers of kitsch and rainbow colours that made Honey laugh at loud.  
"Oh good heavens," Honey laughed, "Plastique, what on earth are you wearing?!"  
"Oh, this!" Plastique grinned, twirling to show off the rainbow outfit, "This is the official German costume for the 2014 Winter Olympics! Cool, huh? We'll all be wearing these when we get to Sochi!"  
"Uh..."  
Honey stopped laughing.


	3. Chapter 3

Honey avoided Alf the next day. Sitting there, alone on the computer, in the dark room, away from the other members of Welle: Erdball, the others who clearly wanted to force him to go to Sochi with them. Honey was looking up information about the Winter Olympics on the internet. He didn't want to, but he couldn't help it. It was everywhere. All of the German messageboards, and indeed, even the messageboards elsewhere in the world, were dominated by one thing. Them. It was big news that Alf had signed them up for the upcoming Winter Games, and that meant, that, like everything else, it was all over the internet. Reading the comments was terrible but he just couldn't stop himself. He had to know what people thought about all of this. Some wished them luck, some were confused, but the ones annoying him most of all were the ones making fun of them.  
  
 _'lol did you hear welle: erdball are gonna be in the sochi olympics looooooool they're doin bobsled or somethin', seriously this is so ridiculous'_  
  
 _'Pfftt... Welle: Erdball are in the German Winter Olympic team, Sochi 2014 is a total joke'_  
  
 _'hey, I am from america and who are these welly football people? I've never heard of them, TOP LEL'_  
  
 _'omg @ imagining welle erdball in the rainbow olympic clothes hahahaaaaa'_  
  
 _'Germany cannot into bobsled'_  
  
 _'Cant wait for the welle erdball bobsled racing i bet theylll come last lollollllolol'_  
  
Normally Honey wouldn't let himself be annoyed by people with such atrocious spelling and grammar, but this was different. But if he couldn't take this seriously, how could he expect that other people would? Honey sighed as he switched off the monitor and the messages finally disappeared. This was all Alf's fault.  
  
\---  
  
When Honey walked out of that room, away from the computer and the messages, he thought he had left the world of the Winter Olympics far behind. But no, he had to put up with Alf talking to him all day about Sochi. Alf was constantly talking about how their Sochi tickets had arrived in the mail. It was well known that Welle: Erdball didn't travel by plane, so it was going to be a long journey to Russia.  
No. Not if he didn't go. He couldn't go, he didn't want to. It was totally unfair that Alf was forcing them all to go to Sochi. It was then that Honey decided to hide the tickets to Sochi that Alf had carelessly left on the table. He put them in the pocket of his coat, and decided to pretend they had gone missing.  
"Honey," Alf asked the next day, "You don't know where the Sochi tickets are, do you? It's just that I can't find them anywhere. I'm sure they were there on the table, but I can't find them now."  
Honey made up a story on the spot. Alf had been talking to Sonnenbrandt about the Winter Olympics earlier, so Honey made up a story where Alf had left the tickets with them.  
"Oh, didn't you give the tickets to Sonnenbrandt?" Honey said, "Yes, you said they were going to hold on to them, for safekeeping, until we needed them."  
"What?" Alf said, "I definitely don't remember doing that!"  
"I don't remember you doing that either, Alf," Venus said.  
"Well, you did," Honey said, "You did do that."  
Alf was confused. He hadn't done that! But Honey wouldn't lie to him... _or would he_?


	4. Chapter 4

And so, they arrived at the nearby studio, where Sonnenbrandt were. Alf was busy explaining the situation to the band. It was definitely suspicious, Alf didn't remember giving the tickets to anyone, in fact, he was sure that he had left them right on that table in the computer room. But, if Honey said they were somewhere else, then they must have been.  
"So, Honey says I gave the Sochi 2014 tickets to you," Alf finished, "Do you have them?"  
"Huh... no, we don't have them," said Frau Sonne, "Why would we? You never gave us any tickets. We didn't even know you had the tickets so early."  
"Are you sure?" Honey said, even though he knew they didn't.  
"Ya see Honey," Alf said, "I told you I didn't remember giving the tickets to Sonnenbrandt!"  
"But... but, Alf, is it possible you maybe gave them to Herzinfarkt to look after?" Honey said, "Perhaps Die Perlen? Oh yes, I remember now..."  
"Possibly..." Alf shrugged, "But I don't remember giving the tickets to anyone... only you seem to remember this happening..."  
"Yeah," Plastique said, "I don't remember this either."  
"Hmmm," Herr Brandt grinned, "Or maybe someone just doesn't want to go to Sochi after all."  
Oops. And they all turned to look at Honey, who shifted uneasily as he realised he had been caught.  
"I-I don't know what you're talking about..." Honey said.  
"Honey, turn out your pockets," Alf said, annoyed.  
"Heh, well there's no need to-" Honey tried to get out of it, but he had to face facts. His plan had well and truly failed. Honey regretted putting the tickets into his pocket rather than hiding them somewhere else.  
"NOW," Alf yelled, as Honey brought the tickets out of his pocket.  
"S-sorry," Honey said, handing the tickets back to Alf.  
Sonnenbrandt just laughed.  
"Oh, how embarrasing!" Korg chuckled.  
"Yes, how embarrasing indeed!" Alf glared at Honey, "I am so sorry Sonnenbrandt."  
"Oh, it's no problem! Good luck at Sochi you guys!" Herr Brandt laughed as Welle: Erdball walked away.  
  
\---  
  
"Do you have no shame?" Alf yelled as the four of them walked back into their studio.  
"Do you?" Honey yelled, "How can you not see that this Sochi idea is terrible?"  
Alf ignored him and continued ranting.  
"Don't you see how embarrassing that was? You made a complete embarrassment of all of us in front of Sonnenbrandt," Alf said, before adding, "And you lied to me about the tickets! How could you lie about something that you knew was so impotant to me?"  
"I... didn't mean to lie to you," Honey said, that was truly the only part he regretted, "How can I make it up to you?"  
Alf grinned.  
"By coming to Sochi with us," he replied.  
"Anything but that," Honey rolled his eyes. He was getting more and more annoyed with this by the second. But Alf wouldn't take no for an answer. And sometimes, it was easier to just give in, no matter how much ridicule you got.  
  
\---  
  
In the build up to the Olympics, the coverage regarding Welle: Erdball was getting more and more intense. Honey was annoyed that more time was spent talking about their Olympic team than on more important news. Not to mention that Russia had recently introducted new oppressive laws against the Russian LGBT community and the news about this was getting overtaken by coverage of Alf's ridiculous plan to enter the Olympics. Well, at least the German rainbow costume was a statement against it.  
"It's always been my dream to enter the Olympics!" Alf grinned as he walked into the room one day, wearing the full Team Germany outfit.  
"No it bloody well hasn't," Honey snapped, "You've never even mentioned the Olympics to me before all this!"  
That was true. Why this? Why now? Was Alf having some sort of crisis? Either way, Honey knew all of them would definitely be having a crisis once they actually had to ride the bobsled, something which none of them had any idea how to do. 


	5. Chapter 5

Today was finally the day. The opening ceremony of the 2014 Sochi Winter Olympic Games. Honey had hoped they would just be watching it on the TV, but no, Alf just had to drag them all the way to Sochi. To participate in something they had absolutely no prior experience in, and, to most likely, come last, making a complete embarassment of both themselves and their country. And so, here they were. Welle: Erdball. Standing there, in that tunnel, waiting for the people who would tell them to walk out into the arena and join the parade of nations. Honey was still complaining about the whole event.  
"These games are a bloody joke! And just look at this costume! This is completely ruining our image!" Honey complained, looking down at the rainbow outfit that he was wearing.  
"Oh calm down Honey," Plastique laughed, "You're making this into a bigger deal than it has to be."  
Suddenly, the organisers of the event walked in to tell all of the Germans to get ready. It was time.  
Cheering erupted from the crowd as the Germans walked out of the tunnel. A sea of rainbow colours and German flags. And there, amongst the other German competitors, were Welle: Erdball, Honey trying his best to hide behind the others, so that he couldn't be seen, horrified that his groups dark gothic image was now falling apart. Alf just laughed at Honey's obvious embarrassment.  
"Bloody hell, I can feel all the cameras zooming in on us," Honey said, "This is so embarrassing!"  
"Oh come on Honey, don't be such a drama queen!," There's hundreds of other Germans here, all wearing the same! I bet no ones even looking at us!"  
But suddenly, they heard a voice coming from high above the stands.  
"And if you look there, yes, right there," the voice of the Olympic commentator blasted out from the surrounding loudspeakers, "That is the German electronic group Welle: Erdball."  
"Welle: Erdball, Welle: Erdball!" They heard chanting from a group of people in the crowd, as Honey turned and saw people holding up flags with the W:E logo on them.  
"Are you sure no ones looking at us?!" Honey yelled.  
"Honey, they're our fans!" Venus grinned, "They're not laughing at us! I'm sure they'd all still love us even if we all walked out dressed up as chickens."  
"Oh, don't give Alf any ideas please, Venus," Honey said, still trying to hide behind the others, "He'll think that's a good idea, and we'll be in chicken costumes next."  
"Yup," Alf said, "There's always the 2016 Olympic Games in Rio!"  
"No," Honey said, "No there's not Alf. We'll be watching that one on TV. So shut up."  
Alf just laughed at that, as the Georgian team began to walk on behind them.  
  
\---  
  
This year, things were being ran slightly differently in regards to the opening and closing ceremony. All of the competitors were going to sit in the audience so that they could watch the rest of the opening ceremony. Which meant that, after the Germans had finished their part in the parade, Welle: Erdball sat in the crowd, watching the rest of the opening ceremony from a distance. Various scenes from Russian life and culture were played out in creative forms. A Tchaikovsky soundtrack began to play as the sky lit up with fireworks. Even Honey had to admit that it looked pretty good when all those fireworks were set off, and even better when the Olympic flame was lit. It was beautiful, in fact. Maybe these games wouldn't be so bad after all.


End file.
